Friday, December 28, 2007

Mary beat up Jesus on Christmas

Oh look there's baby Jesus (Brandon) in the manger (bucket) and Mary (Jordan) squashing him because she wanted to be in the manger too. Poor Brandon. He ended up crying during the nativity play at my grandparent's house on Christmas Eve. It really ended up being hysterically funny because he kept trying to push her out of the manger and she'd get out then try to climb back in. I was reading the Christmas story and having a hard time not crying laughing. Kids sure make everything interesting. We had a really lovely Christmas overall. I got an Ipod Nano which I am thrilled about. A new cellphone, and a years membership to the gym I've been wanting to join.

Speaking of working out, I am now thinner than I was when I got pregnant with Brandon. Sure I've got a ways to go but I've lost the 30 lbs. that little heifer made me gain. LOL Kidding! I'm really enjoying going work out at the gym. I get two hours of uninterrupted me time. It's awesome.

Here is my redneck (AKA Alexis) in the Tony Stewart car she asked us for.

Yep all in all a pretty good Christmas. =0)



Monday, December 17, 2007

So excited!

I've decided to try out for a design team position at The Little Scrap Shop! Everyone wish me luck please and keep your fingers crossed! Here are the LO's I submitted. I had to use 6 of my favorites and one altered project. This is what I came up with!

Wednesday, December 12, 2007

Please help!

Okay our church is having a talent/no talent show Sunday night. I agreed to participate. There's only one problem! I can't decide which song to sing. I've narrowed it down to three and could use a bit of help. Please click on each of the three links below and listen to the song... Don't pay attention to the cruddy kid or the other stuff on the video. Just listen. (I didn't actually tape myself because my hair wasn't fixed etc. I look wild this morning. LOL) Then please comment and tell me which song you think I should sing... Please! Thanks a bunch!

Here's the first link... Silent Night

Second... Hark the Herald

Third... What Child is This?

Wednesday, December 5, 2007

Broke Back Momma

Ugh! My back is still killing me from last night. I was playing on the floor with Jordan in her room when she JUMPED on my stomach and I felt something happen in my back. I couldn't move for about 10 minutes. I finally got up and am doing a bit better today but Alexis yelled at Jordan... "You broke Momma!" LOL I found that hilarious, it's not a good idea to laugh while you have an injured back though. Not a good idea at all. Oh and this was after Jordan rubbed my not recently shaved legs and informed me that they were "thickery". Which I have no idea what that means. Sticky? Pokey? You mean the hair is so thick it's like a thicket? What? LOL

I have good news! My kids are not the only weird ones!!! Imagine that. The other day I brought Alexis to gymnastics and was sitting there feeding Brandon when this cute little girl came and sat beside us and was talking to Brandon and I. We talked about her nickname and how old she was. She asked me what Brandon was eating. I told her and then... She said, "Guess what? One time I ate a dead roach off of the floor. It was kinda sour." Ummm yes I imagine it was dear! LOL Ick. I thought it was only my kids that went up and said crazy stuff to random strangers. Now I don't feel so bad.

Speaking of gymnastics, Alexis has been moved up to the next level which is fabulous! It means I get to go sit in the cold on Friday morning in hopes of getting her a spot in the Saturday class before all of the others fill up. YAY! I'm going to freeze my butt off, but I am so proud of her. She had a Dr's appointment today and they increased her bi-polar and ADHD meds. I hope it helps.

Anyway that's it for now,

Monday, November 26, 2007

You might be a redneck if...

Ahhh Thanksgiving... A time to be thankful, a time to be with your family, a time for tractor surfing? What?! Okay I admit this is my family, but I admit it under great duress. For my grandparent's very first holiday back in their home since Katrina, my Uncle got the hilarious idea to take the kids "tractor surfing". I wouldn't let my kids get on but I couldn't help but covertly tape the madness through the window. You might be a redneck if tractor surfing is the highlight of your Thanksgiving. Watch!

My neighbors think I'm crazy BTW! Brandon has started crawling quicker and quicker and we put the tree up last weekend complete with the ancient nativity set my mother-in-law gave us from when my husband was a baby. Okay maybe it's not ancient but it's old. Anyway Brandon is fascinated with the nativity scene. I spend half of the day pulling him off it and out from under the tree. The best part... The other day, I left the room for a second and he crawled over there and had part of the nativity scene in his mouth. Keep in mind the window is open while I fuss at him... "Don't eat baby Jesus!!!!" I don't know what the neighbors thought but they looked at me rather funny later that day. Hehehe. Then Ronnie informs me that since it's so old it's probably covered in lead paint. Ugh! The joys of being a mother in a minefield of dangers to your children. Vaccines, lead paint, drinking out of water hoses... funny but we all survived.

I have an Alexisisim to share again... That child keeps me in stitches. The other day we were hanging ornaments on the tree and I told Alexis "This is the ornament your Daddy and I bought on our honeymoon." Her eyes got really big and she said, "You went to the moon Momma?" I have officially reached a whole new level of coolness. I went to the moon. Never mind that I tried to explain what a honeymoon was. The child is now convinced that we went to the moon. Some days I wish I could go to the moon. I bet it's quiet there, but there's probably no tractor surfing either.


Tuesday, November 13, 2007

What am I doing today?

Oh well I'm glad you asked... I spent the first few minutes of my morning reading some of the best of Craigslist postings. Those will get you for sure. Thought I was going to spit my coffee all over the computer. LOL My favorite one was the one about being flashed on i-90. It's great. I think the drawings at the bottom for illustration were... priceless!

The rest of my day will be spent being a vegetable. The bus is bringing Jordan home. I don't have to leave. I am still in my pajamas. I don't want to do anything. The house is clean. I'm listing some stuff on craigslist to make space for the Christmas tree to go up. I usually put my Christmas tree up around the first weekend in November but having been so sick I haven't been able to. That puppy goes up this weekend! Why do I put it up so early? Because I have so much stuff and it takes so long to get up that I would like to look at it for more than 30 days before I have to put it back up in the attic. Besides I loooooooove Christmas. Making presents, buying presents, baking cookies (ok buying cookies at Walmart and pretending to have baked them), hot chocolate (even though it's 80 degrees out DAMN you La. weather!!!). I LOVE it all.

We've discovered baby spinach for salad at my house. I'd never eaten it before but DH accidentally picked up the wrong bag of salad at the store. It looked gross but I ate it and OMG it was so good! I gave some to Alexis who is really awesome about eating her vegetables. She looked at me funny, but didn't say anything and proceeded to eat it. Great! No problems. Jordan looked at me like I was crazy when I tried to feed it to her.

The next day we went to Alexis' psychiatrist appointment where he put her back on her ADHD meds (THANK YOU GOD!) And as we were walking in we passed some rather large bushes in the front landscaping. Alexis says "Hey, Can we eat those leaves too?" The child actually thought I went outside and plucked our landscaping to make dinner. Of course there were other people around when she said this! Why can't they say the goofy/embarrassing stuff when we are alone?!

Saturday we got up and decided that it would be fun to go have breakfast at the Beau Rivage casino in Mississippi. We got everyone dressed and Alexis was in a horrible mood. Whining, crying, complaining, until... We got to the casino and we made the obligatory potty run before going to eat. (Jordan is starting to do better in the potty training department finally!) Well we get in the bathroom and it is FANCY! You know how casino bathrooms are... inlaid mosaics... marble... Not at all like the plastic potty covered with stickers at my house! Alexis and Jordan went and then Jordan started looking for the "flusher" as she calls it so she could say "bye bye to the pee pee". All of the sudden WHOOOOOSH! The toilet flushes itself extremely loudly. Both of the girls very loudly exclaim OOOOH A MAGIC POTTY! I could hear the people in the other stalls snickering. The conversation that followed was quite interesting....

A: OH WOW Mom how does the potty flush itself?
Me: I don't know honey. It can tell when you get up and it flushes.
A: How does it know when I get up?
Me: Ummm... It has a motion sensor.
A: Well how does it know that I'm done and didn't just forget the toilet paper. Sometimes I get down when I forget the toilet paper.
Me: I don't guess it knows honey. I guess it would flush every time you get up.
A: Well then it's not very smart then.
Me: *Sigh* No I guess it isn't a very smart potty.

Everyone in the bathroom is audibly giggling now. Oh well thank God I don't embarrass easily. It could be worse. One time Alexis announced to the whole bathroom that I was wearing my "fancy" panties that you can see through. Then she asked me if she could have fancy panties when she grows up. Ummm sure honey. Just don't flush them down the magic potty ok?


Monday, November 5, 2007

Bubba is 8 mos! Look how big!

Brandon James is 8 mos, 20 lbs., and 29 inches tall! Bigger than most 1 year olds I know. Jeez. My little future linebacker... Go Saints! Hehe.


I've been MIA! I am so stupid. I should've insisted on a different doctor or something. After Brandon was born I started having this sharp pressure pain in my chest under my ribs in the middle. I was also throwing up during the pains. It was miserable. I went to the Dr. and he told me that I was stressed out. I should've insisted on a second opinion. I had my doubts that throwing up was caused by stress.

Fast forward to last Thursday around 5 when I got the same pressure feeling. I was up ALL night throwing up over and over. Ronnie went to work on Friday because I felt a bit better. After he left though I got worse, the entire day I was in misery. I finally told him that when he got home (he couldn't come home early because he rides the commuter van with other people) that I was going to the emergency room.

The first thing they said when I got to the ER was "sounds like you have gall stones". Great! (Why didn't the other Dr. figure that out? I've been dealing with this for 8 mos. now?) They did an ultrasound and I had a gall stone lodged in the duct that the bile is supposed to escape from the gall bladder in. That's why I was in such severe pain! They admitted me and said that my gall bladder had to come out.

The next morning they did an MRI which showed that I had a "bunch" of gall stones in addition to the one blocking the duct. That was Saturday. It showed that my gall bladder was extremely infected as well so they started tons of IV antibiotics. They then inform me that if my gall bladder would've burst I could've died. (Which makes me even angrier at the Dr. I've been seeing.) I sat in the hospital all Saturday waiting to see the GI Dr. who never showed up. Sunday she showed up and said I had to have an endoscopy to get the stone out of the duct or they would have to "open me up" and get it out. If they were able to get the stone out then I could have my gall bladder out laproscopically, but either way it had to come out.

Sunday they did the endoscopy procedure and got the stone out. I felt a bit better, but not 100%. That night I slept so hard. Monday around 11:00 they took my gall bladder out. I've lost 15 lbs. since then because I am still not feeling well. (Not that I can't stand to lose the weight mind you!) I'm sore, beat up, and trying to deal with all three kids, and Dr's appointments. The usual.

Ronnie, his mom, and sister watched the kids. One good thing is that Ronnie is a lot less nervous around Brandon now. Of course, I've had to stop breastfeeding Brandon. He's 8 mos. old but I was planning on going until he was a year old. It just breaks my heart. I wasn't ready. There is still some question as to why my liver levels were so high so I'll be going back for further testing. Please keep me in your prayers.

The funniest thing that struck me was that being in the hospital was the best rest I've had in a long time. Maybe it was God's way of telling me to slow down. I decided to quit one of the stores I was selling at and just stick to one. I'm going to keep designing but a little less than I was before. I'm not going to stress about how sales are. I'm going to remember that this is a hobby that I started to make pages for my kids. I'm going to take it easy.


Tuesday, October 23, 2007

Pumpkin Patch Pics

I got a new photo editing program. This is the result! Pretty cool huh! Brandon at home.
Ronnie and Bubba by the pumpkins... Edited with Adobe Light Room.

This is what happened when I tried to get a picture of all of the kids together at the pumpkin patch! Don't they know I can't scrapbook this!!!!!!

After the pumpkin patch we went to Steph's house and the girls had a blast playing in a wheelbarrow. Doesn't take much to amuse my rednecks! LOL

This is everyone all together at the pumpkin patch. Alexis and Jordan are mad in this one because they... "Don't want to take no pictures". Keep scrolling down for a new post about what's up with us.


I'm such a slacker. I haven't been on here to update in forever. Thanks for reminding me Linda. Let's see. New developments here... Brandon's hernia is worse. We are leaving in an hour to go get it looked at again. He was in the E.R. on Sunday night with a ridiculously high fever. It turns out he has a really awful ear infection which is strange because he never complained at all! So he's doing a bit better with that. They were concerned with his color around his lips. They think something may not be right with his heart, so we go for an echocardiogram on Thursday. At this point I don't know what to think anymore. I'm just praying.

Jordan is doing well. She has to have glasses though. Wish me some serious luck on keeping them on her because I just KNOW it's not going to happen. She picked out cutesy pink ones. We have to go get them when they come in. She's going to be fitted for a new kind of leg braces on Nov. 5th. I can't wait for them to get it done. She's not wearing any lately and is having pain in her feet from not wearing them. The orthopedic Dr. says she'll have to have surgery on her feet when she turns 4. They won't do it before then because she's still growing. I just hope it helps relieve some of her pain.

Alexis is having a hard time. She is off of her ADHD medicine because she was having a racing heart rate and the Dr. would rather be safe than sorry (So would I) and have a cardiac workup done. The problem is that the cardiac Dr. is out of town until November 20th. We are on week two of no ADHD meds and I'm about ready to pull out my hair. Thank goodness she's still on the bipolar meds or we'd really be going nuts. She keeps asking if she can have her medicine so I know she isn't feeling well either. I feel so bad for her because she seems uncomfortable in her own skin at times. It just makes me wish I could help more.

Ronnie and I are doing okay. I'm just exhausted, but is it any wonder? My Dr. wants to put me on anti-depressants but I keep telling him I'm not depressed. I'm just tired. I've been depressed before and this isn't depression. I need more sleep and more time to relax. Speaking of not relaxing I'm still working on stuff for my business. I'm so thrilled to be selling in two stores! I can't wait for PAYDAY! LOL

Journalling question of the month LOL: Do you celebrate Halloween? If so, what do you do? If not, why not? What do you do instead?

Growing up we did celebrate Halloween. Not so much the dressing up and trick-or-treating part, but we'd carve our pumpkins and usually have a bonfire and roast weenies (It's not Halloween without roasted weenies!) and marshmallows. We'd invite friends over and just hang out. Usually we ended up getting in trouble. I'll never forget one Halloween my Mom had one of her friends over and her friend proceeded to get sloppy drunk. She stumbled everywhere and was pretty much a source of entertainment for the whole party. It was pretty funny until my Mom demanded she stop drinking and she got angry and tried to leave IN HER CAR!!! We were all yelling at her to stop and trying to get the keys away from her, but she was too fast and we didn't realize she was trying to leave until it was too late. She backed out of the driveway and straight into the ditch in front of our house at 30 MPH! I don't know how she wasn't injured. My Mom called the cops and they arrested her to keep her safe from herself. I swear there was never a dull moment in my life. "Normal" people don't have these kinds of stories.

Now my husband and I don't celebrate Halloween either. He's Catholic and he is very anti-Halloween. He doesn't mind if we carve pumpkins. We go to the pumpkin patch every year and have a blast. I am thinking this year we may institute the bonfire tradition and let them roast marshmallows over a very tiny fire. I think they'd have a blast. We don't do trick-or-treating because I just don't feel like it's safe for the first part, and the second thing is I'm already paying a fortune to the dentist! Why should I get them buckets of candy to do more damage! Yikes.

Anyway it's time to be off to the Dr. with Brandon. Wish me luck. God knows we need it!

Tuesday, October 9, 2007

A Real Fine Place to Start-The Smuggler-Snake in my Butt

I am very proud to announce that my digital products are on sale at and at!!! I am so excited! I think it's a real fine place to start. I can't believe I've been designing for a month now and have already been picked up by two stores. Amazing.

Brandon is doing somewhat better. The surgery incision has FINALLY closed, but his hernia reoccurred. So he has a huge lump on his belly, but he's able to play on his tummy again so we have hopes that he'll be crawling soon. He's sitting up like a champ tho! See picture below.

Of course there's always something funny/funky/strange going on. The other day at gymnastics Alexis won the handstand contest. She is AMAZING at gymnastics. At 5 she can stand on her head for minutes at a time. Talk about balance! Anyway her prize for winning was a piece of gum. She KNOWS she's not to have gum. I can't count the number of times she's gotten it in awkward places. In her hair, in the carpet, etc. And now she's not allowed to have it. She knew she wasn't. So when she saw Ronnie coming down the steps to get her she darted around the corner and frantically stuffed the gum into the CROTCH of her leotard. In full view of about half a dozen other parents who then stared at Ronnie like "Why is your daughter stuffing gum in her pants?" He said that he was mortified and when he asked her what she was doing she proceeded to pull out the gum and hold it up for him and say "I was saving it for you Daddy." ROFLMAO He wanted to die. I only laugh b/c I wasn't there and didn't have to deal with it! For once a weird thing happened to Daddy. Hahahaha! Ok but seriously I asked her later if she was going to eat it and she said yeah. So we had the whole germ talk again. She's such a TOMBOY! The other day while in time out she itched herself like a man. Ronnie keeps demanding that I teach her to be a lady. I am trying! It's just not sticking! Any suggestions?

As far as Jordan goes... We've been potty training. Not very successfully at that, but the other day she was on the potty and I was sitting there with her hoping that this would be the time she'd decide to be potty trained. No dice Mom! She's just not very interested and I'm not pushing her. It was funny though because she passed gas and announced to me "I got a snake in my butt!" She was so freaked out. I guess she hasn't heard it before because it was muffled by her diaper. I spent 5 minutes convincing her that there was no snake in her butt and I'm not sure she believes me yet!


Tuesday, September 25, 2007

D@mn is NOT a sight word.

OH MY GOD. Have I mentioned yet on here that I'm tired of homework? Well it's not even my homework and I am. Alexis, who is in kindergarten, has so much homework that it's ridiculous. Worksheets, spelling, handwriting, and math. Seriously. Every week there's a homework sheet sent home that looks like something out of a college syllabus. (Ok maybe not but there's a whole lot of stuff on it!) Seriously, I'm waiting on it to say...


Discuss the deeper meaning that interactions on the playground have in your day to day life.


Write a dissertation on where the letter A came from and how it's effected the English language.


We spent two hours on homework last night. There is a laminated sheet of 40 words that are "sight" words. The words she should recognize when she sees them. She has to memorize them. I was going down the list with her asking her what the words were and correcting her when she was wrong.

Me: What's this word?
Alexis: Purple
Me: No. It's "me".
Alexis: Ok
Me: What's this word?
Alexis: Purple
Me: No. That's "can".
Alexis: Mom, Can I have a car?
Me: Come on Alexis pay attention. Do your homework. What's this word?
Alexis: Purple
Me: You can't just say purple for everything. I know purple is on the list and you'll be right once but you have to try. That word is "green". What's this word?
Alexis: (In a serious but questioning tone... ) Damn?
Me: No honey. Damn isn't a sight word. *Sigh*

Wednesday, September 19, 2007

Princess' Poo Poo and Ditch Water

Two days ago Alexis came home with some ummm marks in her underwear where she hadn't wiped correctly. I was sitting there explaining proper wiping technique to her and Jordan's room is right across the hall. I told her that she had to make sure she got everything off before putting her underwear back on even if it meant *gasp* using more than one handful of toilet paper. Of course before we fussed at her for using half a roll of toilet paper every time she went. So I guess that she's either going to use half a roll of paper each time or not wipe well enough... anyway! Jordan's room is across the hall from the bathroom and she hears the conversation and promptly chimes in, "Alexis is a Princess Poo Poo." which ticked Alexis off to high heaven. I told her that it wasn't nice and she dropped it after about 5 more minutes of torturing her.

Yesterday we got home from meeting with Jordan's physical therapist because her feet are getting worse and worse and I needed to discuss things with her before the orthopedic surgeon decided he wants to do surgery and I have no other options to suggest to him. When we got home I brought Jordan in the house and then turned around and went outside for Brandon. When I turned towards the house I saw that she'd gotten out and was running hell bent for the street. There's only one problem. There's a big ditch between our yard and the street on a big downward slope. Once she gained momentum going down the slope she couldn't stop and SPLASH! Of course it had rained the day before right? She was full of algae and mud, and she was mad at me. Momma I'm all dirty clean my up.

Of course the neighbors were outside, and I got the hysterical giggles. I was laughing so hard I could barely pull the child out of the ditch and I almost dropped Brandon. I giggled my way inside and by this time Jordan was laughing too. I put Brandon in his exersaucer and dumped her unceremoniously into the tub. Where she proceeded to inform me that she is "Princess Ditch Water". Indeed darling you are, but I love you anyway!


Thursday, September 13, 2007

Random Facts About Me...

7 Random Facts About Moi!
Adriann tagged me and here are the rules: I must post the rules, then list 7 random things about me and then tag 7 others to do the same by leaving them a comment.

My middle name is Joy.
I used to be in the choir in High School.
I can touch my nose with my tongue.
I can whistle really well.
My head hurts right now.
My husband makes me crazy.
I drive red minivan.

If I tag you, you better do it! LOL

Alexis had homework the other day. It said to list two words that start with 'b'. She chose Bubba (her brother's nickname) and butt. A responsible parent would've made her choose other 'b' words. What did I do? Wrote them down and sent them in. LOL

As if I wasn't busy enough I volunteered myself to do the newsletter for Jordan's hippotherapy center. I don't really mind though. Speaking of busy... Whew getting this digital business off of the ground is hard work. I'm constantly designing or doing something.

And talk about a small world. One of my former foster kids is in Jordan's class at school! It's one of the ones that was reunited with her birth mother but IMHO her birth mother was doing everything right. It's so good to see her. She keeps staring at me like "Hi Don't I Know You!" LOL She's a cutie pie for sure.

Oh and Lexie got the Terrific Kid Award this year... That's two years in a row!

Anyway sorry I'm not keeping up too well. Hopefully once things settle down a bit,

Tuesday, September 4, 2007

A new adventure!

Some of you already know that I've started a new adventure. When brainstorming and trying to come up with a way to pay the mountains of medical bills Brandon's surgery has incurred I came up with trying my hand as a digital designer. Here's a link to my other blog if you want to see what I've got going on... I'm very excited about it and hoping that it works!

I've got a quote to share with you all today that just hit me really deeply the other day when I was reading.

"In spite of illness, in spite even of the archenemy sorrow, one can remain alive long past the usual date of disintegration if one is unafraid of change, insatiable in intellectual curiosity, interested in big things, and happy in small ways." Edith Wharton, A Backward Glance

How true that quote is! I find that I am the least stressed out when I go with the flow of all of the changes and problems, remain interested in learning new things, and appreciating the small stuff!

An update on us: Jordan is enjoying school. A whole lot. She's spoiled rotten there. LOL She's been missing being the center of attention with the new baby around and all. I'm so happy she likes school now. She still won't eat though. Alexis is doing much, much better. Praise God for that! I know we will go through good times and bad times with her due to her meds needing to be changed and all. It's just such a relief to be in a good time. She has gymnastics again tonight which she TRULY loves. So I'm excited about that. Ronnie is all excited about the Dale Earnhardt movie being on TV tonight. He's leaving me with Brandon at Lexie's gymnastics and coming home early with Jordan just so he can watch it. Mr. Brandon's belly button is still open. He had another procedure done in the office last Thursday. Please keep him in your prayers. We cannot figure out what's going on and get it to close. =0(


Tuesday, August 28, 2007

Moose Farts and Mopping Me

Why does the weird stuff happen to me? Seriously. Wednesday of last week I had to have two teeth pulled. My stupid wisdom teeth came in wrong. Well I was nervous about it to begin with because I had to be put to sleep and had to sign this paper that said... you know you can have other teeth broken if these are hard to get out, you may swallow tooth pieces, you may have an infection at the IV site, you may die, you may turn into a purple people eater when the anesthesia wears off (yadda, yadda, yadda). I swear they try to scare you half to death before the procedure even starts!!! I had to pump milk for a month to get Brandon enough to last for the 24 hours I couldn't feed him due to the anesthesia. Seriously that kid can EAT! So I take the relaxing pills that I'm supposed to take and DH drives me to the "oral surgeons". Not just a dentist. A surgeon! Yikes. (Refer to my last blog on how much of a weenie I am about blood and icky surgery stuff! LOL)

I get in there and they inform me that I'm going to have to put a second mortgage on my house to get the surgery done. Okay not really but 818 dollars is a lot of money! They take me back and put me in the chair and put this wonderfully loopy gas on my nose. Yum! I'm breathing as deeply as I can hoping to be as knocked out as possible when they do the IV. I hate needles! They cover me up in a blanket, and the big light comes on. Oh boy. Then the doctor comes in. He asks the nurse and anesthesiologist if they heard about Moose gas causing global warming?! He says apparently Norwegian moose toots are causing global warming. They make the same amount of emissions in a year equal to an over 1000 mile car trip! In my head I'm thinking I must be dreaming. I must be asleep. The surgeon is talking about Moose farts! Then he says "I was going to buy a moose but now since I know they are that gassy I don't want one anymore." Is he serious?! Why do you need a moose? That's crazy.... Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz I was out! The next thing I remember they were walking me to the car. As soon as I was capable (drooling gauze and all) I went to the computer to look it up and here it is!!! MOOSE TOOTS ARE CAUSING GLOBAL WARMING! I was really afraid that my poor drug addled mind had invented it all. LOL

On a different topic... My kids. Gosh they can come up with some stuff. Jordan is a little parrot. Whatever you say will eventually come out of her mouth, and usually not at the best time. Like when my Mother-In-Law was here and she dropped something and said DAMN IT! Really loudly. My MIL didn't catch it though thank goodness. Well Jordan has taken to repeating the things that Alexis says which isn't funny sometimes because she's picked up saying... Nobody likes me. I hate everybody. Recently Alexis was in one of her moods and was stomping around griping about how the world has it out for her, and Jordan was repeating everything back to her. Very loudly! (Jordan does everything very loudly just like me.) Well Alexis stormed into the kitchen and yelled at me. MOMMA!!! JORDAN WON'T QUIT MOPPING ME! It took me a full 5 minutes to stop laughing and understand that she was trying to tell me that Jordan was 'mocking' her. Hehehe. I swear sometimes I'm evil with the stuff I think is funny, but if you'd have seen how mad she was about being mopped... You'd have laughed too!

Brandon's bellybutton is still gross! We went back Thursday for another check-up and it looks like it's reforming another granduloma. Great! At least we won't have to do another surgery because we know it's not connected to the bladder. It's just gross and painful for him. Poor little dude. Thursday morning was also Alexis' psychiatrist appointment and we are seeing light at the end of the tunnel! After an ADHD med change to methyline and an increase in her bipolar meds she is doing almost 100% better. She's still got an attitude but I don't think that's a medicine issue. I just think she's a diva. LOL Thank God things are getting better. I really appreciate everyone's prayers for her. I just know they are helping.

This past weekend was pretty uneventful in spite of my poor pitiful teeth. Eating mashed potatoes and jello for a week sucks, but hey it could be the newest diet plan b/c I'm sure I've lost weight. LOL Yesterday was wild. Jordan had to go get her handicapped parking permit. She has a hard time walking long distances and is getting too heavy to carry. So we went and did that in between her 3 therapies yesterday. She's really excited to be going to school and they are spoiling her rotten because there are 3 aides and a teacher and only 3 kids. So she's got someone's undivided attention at all times. Something I know she was missing here at home with the new baby.

So that's my update. The two girls are at school and Brandon is asleep and me... well I'm just sitting here listening to the quiet. Amazing!

Fabulous journalling question of the week... Describe family reunions. Who, where, when? Why are they important?

I'm getting to the bottom of the journalling question set I have now. I'll have to find a new set. Anyway. Family reunions. We don't really have an organized family reunion. Although I did go to one on my biological Dad's side of the family where I met a ton of people I that I had no idea who they were and I'm sure they probably had no clue who I was either. I mean it's kinda funny to say... Hey here's Heather... She's the bastard child I was telling you about. LMAO They did introduce me as his daughter which was very sweet. On my Mom's side of the family we all get together for Thanksgiving and Christmas every year which is just awesome!

Hugs to all!

Monday, August 20, 2007

Too much going on...

So Thursday we went back to the surgeon to have Brandon's bellybutton checked out. Turns out the top healed over too quickly and formed a pocket of infection which the Dr. reopened in the office and had stuff coming out everywhere. Brandon was sooooo upset. Inconsolable. My poor little man. The Dr. told me I have to stretch the bellybutton hole to keep it open. Grossness! My son has a 1/2 deep hole in his belly. I'm so not good at this! I'm such a weenie that I passed out at 16 years old after skinning my knees while riding my bike. I was sitting on the side of the tub washing my knees off and *WHUMP* fell right off the side of the tub in a dead faint. I woke up on the floor with water running everywhere. I'm SUCH a WEENIE! But I'm also a Mom so I'm sucking it up and doing it but not without making faces and sympathetic noises. Ouch!

Oh guess what! My Mother-In-Law (who I know means well)... She thinks I told Alexis that I'd be happy when she moves out. Well that's NOT what I said!!! Alexis has been fascinated with the fact that she's going to grow up and get married someday. (*I have said I feel sorry for the man who marries her but that's a whole 'nother topic that has something to do with how messily she eats! He'll have to watch her chew with her mouth wide open!) Anyway she mentioned before Brandon's surgery that when she got married she and her husband were going to live here with Ronnie and I. I explained that's not how it's supposed to work. You'll move into your own house with your husband. She asked me if I'd be happy when she left (because I always tell her I miss her and am sad when she's gone) and I said I would be happy for her because getting married is a happy thing! Apparently she told my MIL that "Momma says she'll be happy when I leave and get married because she never wanted kids anyway!" Ummmm WHAT?! And my MIL swallows that hook, line, and sinker and tattle tales to Ronnie on the phone... You'll never believe what Alexis said Heather told her!

Okay first off common sense should've told her that I didn't say I never wanted kids! Ronnie and I went through YEARS of infertility treatment before and after adopting the girls. Second, Alexis makes stuff up! She's bipolar (Don't get me started on how my MIL doesn't think anything is wrong with Alexis!) Third, She had to see me before she could talk to Ronnie! Why on earth didn't she just say, "You know Heather, Alexis said something crazy earlier..." and then let me explain? No she had to go tattletale to Ronnie. Of course Ronnie thought it was funny and laughed. Then she got mad at him. Fourth, You know it really hurts my feelings that she's known me for 7 years and had any thought at all that I might have said something like that. REALLY hurts my feelings. Of course Ronnie got put in the middle of it. I told him next time to tell her if she has a concern to talk to me. I know she probably meant well but Honestly! She must think I'm a horrible person!

Today was Alexis' first day of school! Thank goodness b/c she was going stir crazy around here. Friday she got the brilliant idea to hide a mouthful of Spaghetti O's in her mouth then went and rubbed them in to her bed spread. I know she was probably just exploring her artistic sensitivities. LOL The problem came in when she smuggled liquid hand soap into her room to try to scrub out the Spaghetti O stains. IT WAS EVERYWHERE! My washing machine doesn't like washing comforters full of hand soap. It makes a really squishy sound. I was worried the soap bubbles would overflow but I got lucky on that part. Saturday her therapist said that I need to tell her Dr. we need a huge med adjustment. Alexis isn't sleeping at night and it isn't at all safe to have her wandering around doing God knows what! She could hurt herself or someone else. She told the therapist she wanted to cut the baby doll they were playing with in play therapy. I was freaking out. The therapist says if the aggression doesn't get better she may have to be treated in the hospital for a while. I am praying for that not to happen. I just know she'd be terrified and think we were giving her away for being bad. =0( I have so much going in my head about this... And I just don't know what to do.

Jordan didn't have school today. She was sick so I had to cancel her therapies and take both she and Brandon to the doctor. She has an ear infection and congestion and will be on antibiotics. Mr. Brandon has congestion and needs Benedryl. I haven't slept for 3 nights!!! I've slept sitting up holding him in the recliner. Hopefully tonight will be better.

Sunday we all went to IHOP for breakfast which was an adventure in itself because Ronnie is out of his ADD meds and was CRANKY as all get out. He goes tonight for a refill and tomorrow I'll be there bright and early to get it! Well it was nice but we saw Jordan's biological Aunt. She saw me and knew who I was and didn't even say hello to me or to Jordan. Of course my brain ran at first to that she just was nervous or didn't know what to say. Later I thought that it just might be too painful for her to deal with (She was the Aunt who said she couldn't take care of her after visiting her in the hospital and seeing how involved her care would be.) Or it could've been that she had her own daughter with her and didn't want to have to explain who Jordan was. Either way it just made me sad. I had invited visitation after the adoption but no one in her birth family has pursued it. I send birthday and Christmas pictures and have only gotten 2 letters for Jordan in 2 years.

And now... time for the AMAZING journalling question of the day (OK so it's been more like of the week lately sorry!) Describe your mother's wedding dress. What do you know about her wedding?

I was 5 years old when my Mom got married to my step-dad. I remember the ceremony being held at his Aunt's house. It was a really nice ceremony outside in Buras, La. All of his nieces and nephews were there and I remember playing with them going down a plastic slide after the ceremony was over. (It's funny the little things you remember.) I remember she wore a powder blue dress and she looked so pretty and happy. Her hair was curled and her make-up was perfect. I remember thinking too that I hope I looked as pretty on my wedding day.


P.S. If you got this far... Thanks! LOL

Wednesday, August 15, 2007

Jojo's Crush, A New Trick, and Pincher.

Brandabug is feeling much better this morning and thanks go out to everyone for the prayers! He seems a bit congested but so am I. I hope that is over quickly. He's learned a new trick. Pushing down with his feet while he's on his back to lift his butt in the air! It's cute. He does it over and over and bounces. LOL This morning when Jordan woke up she asked to watch tv. I turned it on and Diego (Dora The Explorer's Cousin) was on. She runs to the TV and sighs in this dreamy voice... Momma Diego is soooooooooooooooo cute! WHAT?! She's 3 and she has a crush. She danced with him to all the songs and helped him rescue the animal in trouble. She kept hollering for him to help her too. In Spanish. Ahhhh young love!? LOL

In my last blog entry I mentioned that Brandon is sleeping in our room. I moved his crib in there the day before the surgery, but not because I wanted to watch him closely after the surgery. Although I did want to. Some of you know Jordan and Alexis were sharing a room. Against Dr. Kutner's (Lexie's Psychiatrists) advice. He had said that we should never leave them alone together for even a minute. Well this is only a 3 bedroom house and I had a really hard time thinking that Alexis would hurt Jordan. Jordan kept getting these bruises on her legs and her butt. I thought it was because of her falling (she falls alot due to her balance issues and cerebral palsy). Well last week one night Jordan told me she had dreams that monsters were pinching her. She's always been a hard sleeper and talked in her sleep. I didn't think anything of it. Until one night I heard rustling around in their room over the baby monitor and then heard Jordan cry. I ran in there and Alexis was out of bed. I asked her what she was doing and in a really ugly mean voice she yelled "I didn't do NOTHING!" I let it go for the time being because I just thought she was sneaking around playing with toys.

The next morning I found a HUGE new bruise on Jordan's butt. It got me to thinking. That night I stayed awake. Listened to the monitor and heard Alexis out of bed. Ran in there but she had heard me getting up out of my bed and jumped into her bed on top of her covers. I told her not to get out of bed again because I know when she does! She pretended to be asleep. The next morning I asked her what was going on and eventually got it out of her that she's been pinching Jordan in the middle of the night. All of those bruises and all of the crying I thought was just nightmares was Jordan getting pinched. I felt terrible for not listening to the doctor, and I resolved to keep the other two kids safe. When asked why she was pinching her she said "because sometimes she wakes me up in the morning and it makes me mad', but Jordan wasn't waking her up.

So that day I put Alexis is her old room, left Jordan in hers, and moved Brandon to ours. Eventually we plan to close in the carport to make a 4th bedroom. At first I really was stressed over all of this. I am just not going to ever leave Alexis alone with either of the other kids or the dog. I wanted to believe different. I should've listened to the Dr. I feel like it's my fault Jordan got hurt.

Yesterday was Jordan's first day back at school! She was excited. She cried a little bit when I left but the teacher said she did excellent once she calmed down. She's getting so big. Alexis starts school on the 20th and then it'll just be me and Brandon at home on Tuesdays and Thursdays.

Exciting Journalling Question of the day: Describe a Childhood Birthday.

When I was little birthday parties weren't like they are now. You didn't rent a venue. You didn't have it catered. Your Mom or Dad baked you a cake (If you were lucky you got one of the fancy ones from the store), and you got to invite a few friends over to your house. You might have ice cream too. MIGHT! There were no 20.00 party favors. You got candy in a bag and a hat if you were lucky. Some parties didn't even have favors! We drank Kool Aid with our cake and went outside to play. No bouncy thing, or water slide. No organized games to play with hired characters. No train, no snowball vendor! NOTHING! And you know what? Those parties were pretty darn cool to me. We were relaxed, not rushing to five million activities. We made up our own games using our imaginations! I miss those days, but not enough to actually have a party at my house! I'm renting a venue for sure! I know I'm a hypocrite. Shoot me. LOL

Monday, August 13, 2007

Surgical Saga

Ugh. Where to begin?!? Okay Friday morning at 10:30 was Brandon's surgery. I got up and fed him at 5:30 and we left. We got there fine. Ronnie had to stay home to bring Alexis to registration and Ronnie's Mom watched Jordan for me so it was just Brandon and I for the long ride to the hospital. My Mom met me at Children's Hospital. We were there early so we had time to settle in. We played with Brandon while waiting for them to take him back. I got nervous when they came to get him. He was so cranky and hungry from not eating before the surgery and we got to go down to the surgical unit and they had rocking chairs for the parents to wait. I guess my Mom was nervous too because we were both rocking away in the chairs. The surgeon came in and spoke to me before the surgery. He told me that he would take care of him and then the nurse came to get him. He woke up (the nervous rocking lulled him to sleep) screaming at the top of his lungs. It almost broke my heart to hand him over to her.

The surgery itself took an hour which felt like an eternity. My Mom did her best to keep me entertained and even at one point had me laughing out loud with her crazy stories about my brothers. She bought Brandon an adorable frog in the gift shop and we just waited. A few times I watched the other surgeons come in and out and tell people that their children were done. They had been there for HOURS. This made me feel grateful that the surgery was not needed for something more serious. They finally came to get me and my little man was so goofy. He looked at me all cross eyed and then buried his head in my neck. My poor boy! It took him about an hour to get oriented enough to want to eat. Which if you know Brandon is a rarity! He loves to eat! After he ate a good bit and kept it down they let us go home around 2pm.

We got home fine. The ride was long again but he slept most of the way. I cleaned up around the house and we ate dinner. Regular stuff. We got the girls bathed and put to bed and then I put Brandon down. I was sooooooo tired. We laid down around 10 and I checked Brandon before I went to bed. (He's sleeping in our room now. Which is a whole other story! Someone mention in the comments and remind me to tell ya'll why he's in my room!) Around 12 I heard him whimper, I said "Okay Bubba I'm coming." Then I went to the bathroom. When I went to pick him up I felt something wet so I turned the light on. His whole bed was covered in vomit. TONS of vomit. I freaked out then changed his clothes and had Ronnie change the bedsheets. I brought him into the living room to rock him back to sleep because they had warned me that he "might throw up once or twice due to the anesthesia". Well... He kept throwing up, and throwing up, and then finally just dry heaving. He was turning pale and lethargic so I started worrying about dehydration and brought him to the ER here near my house.

We got to the ER around 4am. I told them what was wrong and they decided that it was just from the anesthesia and gave him a suppository to stop him from throwing up and sent us home. It was 6am. I ran to the drugstore. By this time I was operating on 2 hours of sleep in a 24 hour period. NOT GOOD! I made it home and ate a biscuit, handed Brandon to Ronnie and passed out.

For one hour! Ronnie came into the bedroom and told me that Brandon "feels SO HOT"! I jump up and feel him. He's burning up. The thermometer says his temperature is 101.6. I decide to take him back to the ER again. Knowing they'll probably laugh at me but something is "not right". Call it mother's intuition. Whatever. We get there around 9:30.

Brandon is admitted back to the rooms right away but we wait hours before seeing a doctor. The doctor orders all kinds of tests and an IV. They couldn't get the IV!!! They stuck that poor baby 7 times! I had to help hold him down. He cried so hard for so long and then he just got quiet. And that broke my heart. It was like he thought "well I guess Mom won't help me so I give up". I ended up bawling after everyone left the room. The finally got the IV in his foot. It was HORRIBLE. They admitted us because the tests came back fine and there was no explanation why he had a fever. His fever ended up getting up to 103.4 at one point.

We spent two days in the hospital and just got home today. Eventually they decided that his immune system was reacting to the surgery and trying to fight an infection before there was one. I know crazy huh? I'm not sure I buy that explanation but he has a follow up with the surgeon on Thursday. I'm supposed to watch for fever, throwing up and swelling again. He is so tired. I'm praying he is okay. He's on oral and antibiotic cream now.

Jordan and Alexis had a really hard time while we were gone. Especially Jordan. It was awful! She kept crying for me on the phone and telling me that she "Berry always loves her Momma and wants her and Brandon to come home". Tomorrow is Jordan's first day back at school. I just hope she has a good day and is happy to be there. My poor darling. She never eats at school either. Alexis starts back on the 20th. When they all go back to school I'm going to just sleep all day when Brandon sleeps. For the past three days I'd say I got a total of 8 hours of very light sleep. I'm exhausted.

Thanks to everyone for the prayers! I just know they helped. =0) No time for a journalling question! Sorry!


Monday, August 6, 2007


Friday afternoon something seemed to be in the air. After juggling three kids at the appointment for Jordan's braces to be repaired so they would stop rubbing on her feet, we came home and Jordan laid down for her nap. Jordan is the type of child that has to wake up entirely on her own or her whole day is ruined. Well, Alexis was in one of her cranky moods and kept yelling and acting up. Brandon was trying to go to sleep but he couldn't because of the noise so he got super cranky. I'm trying to soothe him and get Alexis quiet when she yells and wakes Jordan up. She starts screaming! She startles so easily. So she was scared and tired and just beyond all reason. So now all three of them are screaming. There are 30 minutes left until Ronnie gets home and I don't think I'm going to make it. I put Alexis in time out and hold Jordan and Brandon and we are all sitting on the floor in the living room. I start rocking the smaller two and singing to them and I all the sudden burst into tears. So now everyone's crying. Alexis is having a huge tantrum... Nobody loves her.... Everyone hates her! Jordan is crying... She's tired... She wants her daddy... Brandon is crying.... He's exhausted... and I who hardly ever cry can not take any more. It's about 5 minutes before Ronnie would get home and all of the sudden I get this mental image of him walking in and we are all on the floor crying. This strikes me as hilarious and all of the sudden I'm dying laughing and still crying at the same time. OMG this motherhood stuff gets really interesting. I managed barely to pull myself together before Ronnie walked in the door. I knew he could tell that I'd been crying but I didn't feel like explaining. I was just so OVERWHELMED. Later that night Brandon and I escaped to Walmart. We went grocery shopping. I got back at 9PM. We shopped really slow. Who knew Walmart could be a vacation! I always thought people who hysterically cried were wimps. Well. I know better now. LOL Or maybe I'm a wimp?! Who knows.

Saturday I spent most of the day reading the new Harry Potter book. I had decided that I deserved a break. I left the laundry undone. Didn't do dishes. Barely cooked. Until I had the whole book read. OH MY GOODNESS. I'm not going to go into detail for anyone who hasn't read it but OMG it was awesome! Seriously. I'm such a dork!

Sunday I spent the whole day paying for not doing housework the day before. Ick. I had tons of laundry and everything else to do but it was so worth it. I needed a day of down time. Today is Monday. Therapy day. One of the therapies cancelled but I still have two to go to for Jordan. I'm going to drop off some books we rented at the library. I'm not crazy enough to go in. We'll do a driveby and I'll throw them in the book depository. I'm not a glutton for punishment you know!

The fabulous journalling question of the day: What is the most important lesson you've learned that you would like to share with others.

Most probably that would be 'don't sweat the small stuff". Don't obsess over every little minor upset in life. Ask yourself "Is this problem I'm having today going to matter to me tomorrow, a week from now, a month from now?" It really helps put things into perspective for me. Something that might be bugging me horribly today won't even matter to me next week and isn't as huge of a deal that I feel it is at the time! Learning this lesson has helped me to sit back and enjoy the ride. Sure it's a wild ride but it's also fun! And just look at the memories I'm leaving my kids (besides the one of us all crying on the floor LOL)


Thursday, August 2, 2007

Missing in Action

Well ladies. I'm sorry I've been missing. I have been counting the seconds until August 20th so I can get a break. Alexis has been having a really hard time. Brandon's belly button is still really icky. I'm not looking forward to his surgery but hopefully everything will be all fixed up and he won't have to worry about it any more. Poor little man. Anyway the reason I've been missing other than that is I made another digital CT team. Which means I now have to do 3 layouts per week. So I'm busy busy, but it's a whole lot of fun. If you ever want to see my layouts or wonder what I am up to you can check the Links I Love section on the right hand side to get to my gallery.

Long Awaited (Sorry) Journalling Prompt of the Day: Tell about the fashion trend changes you've seen in your lifetime.

OMG you want to hear about fashion from someone whose uniform is shorts and Hanes Her Way T-Shirts! ROFLOL Okay well... I am a true child of the 80's. I remember like yesterday how very COOL I was when I got my very first tie dyed shirt. I was so excited to wear it to school! With what you may ask.... Black leggings and two pairs of neon socks! Together! Neon Orange and Lime Green. Not to mention Ellesse shoes that were the HOTTEST thing in my school. Everyone had to have them AND my hair was spiral permed. And I remember begging my Mom to pay 100 dollars to get it done. Looking back.... OMG! Seriously.

Then in the 90's... Flannel shirts. I wore flannel shirts to school all the time. Over a colored T-shirt that had to match the print. I had long blonde hair and HUGE poofy bangs. And I remember crying in the morning if my hair didn't curl up into the poof exactly the way I wanted it to. I wore baggy jeans and platform sneakers. What a disaster! If I could see myself now I probably would point and laugh at myself. Oh and let's not forget the must have jean jacket.

I think I can very safely say that I have never been a fashion icon... Oh there are my parachute pants. I'm going to jump on outta here!


Friday, July 27, 2007

Just Breathing.

Today is a good day. The baby is asleep. I'm sleep deprived because Jordan has been up since 1am, but it isn't an exhausted sleep deprived. LOL I finished a new digi LO that got all sorts of compliments, and I was offered another month on the creative team. Alexis is doing pretty well. She keeps repeating things over and over but I'll take that over a temper tantrum any day.

Ronnie has promised to watch the kids so I can sleep tonight. I guess he's trying to attone for kicking me (yes literally) last night so I could get up with Jordan. He had to drive the commuter van this morning and had to get some rest. You know for the longest time he fussed about me going back to sleep after he left for work and said, "Well I get up earlier than you do." As an excuse to tell me how he was SO much more tired than I was. I later found out. On the days he doesn't drive that turkey sleeps the whole hour and a half drive in! He's getting tons more sleep than I am. Can you believe it! Men.

Oh and Jordan had a nightmare about Cookie Monster last night. That was why she was up at 1am. Poor baby is deathly afraid of one of Brandon's Cookie Monster toys. She told me that she dreamed that he was in her belly trying to get her to eat more cookies. Awww. Poor baby. Someone should tell Cookie Monster she already eats enough cookies for 6 people. That's why her nickname is Cookie!

So today I am just breathing. Getting by and trying to relax some. Oh. I found out that they are going to build a new subdivision behind us. Right behind us. So I'll have backyard neighbors. Thank goodness I have my fence now. Who knows if I'll like these people. All though it would be pretty cool if I did. Can you tell I'm a bit of a recluse? And speaking of recluses maybe they'll be less spiders and snakes and wiggly things if my backyard doesn't back up to the wilderness. Ick!

Enough babbling. Drumroll please: Journalling prompt of the day: What do you know about your paternal grandparents? Tell about your relationship with them.

This is not going to be good. Ok. By now you know that I was a one night stand baby. But what most of you don't know is that my Dad was my Mom's best friend's brother, and she was in LOVE or what she thought was LOVE with him. Anyway the stories I hear about my paternal grandparents are not good ones. My grandfather was a raging alcoholic. My Uncles who were also friends with my Dad told me a story about my grandfather coming home drunk and peeing on the stero in the corner. Lovely right? My grandmother was very subdued and was ordered around by my grandfather. Eventually she divorced him, and by the time I met my grandfather he'd been sober for quite a while and had become very involved in the church. He married a younger woman and I have an Aunt who is much younger than I am. My grandmother died of cancer a few years ago. Before she died I got to go stay with her for a week in Lake Charles, La. She was a very sweet and caring person, and I wish I could've known her better. I have a picture of her that I am going to scrap.


Thursday, July 26, 2007

Pull your self up by your boot straps and keep walking.

So I've been whiny lately. I know. I've decided today I am going to count my blessings to remind myself why it's such a good thing to be me.

Blessing number One: Ronnie... He can be a HUGE ENORMOUS PAIN IN THE BUTT, but He's a really excellent Daddy. He takes very good care of us. He works really hard to get us everything we need and he really has been God's gift to me. Not many people know that I prayed for God to send me the right man. In good times and in bad he is the right man for me!
Blessing Number Two: Alexis... We've been having a really hard time. It's NOT her fault at all. She really is such a sweet little girl. Always wanting to play with her sister and brother. She's so full of life and energy. She enjoys every minute she can to it's fullest. She makes me laugh. She is my scrapbooking buddy!
Blessing Number Three: Jordan... My sweet little goofy girl who doesn't understand that Saturdays are for sleeping in! I just have to look at her and I smile. She's my inspiration. The reason I know nothing is impossible. She's got such an imagination and I love when she includes me in her make believe. She's my beautiful brown eyed girl. I love her belly laugh.

Blessing Number Four: Brandon James... His surgery is scheduled for August 10th. He's my squishy cheeked Bubba. He's got a high pitched squeaky voice right now that gives me the giggles. I love to blow bubbles on his belly and 'eat' his tummy to get him to laugh. He's got the longest skinniest little legs and toes. He's my happy little man.

Blessing Number Five: Lady... Yes I have to count the dog! She's had it rough with her epilepsy and everything but she is GREAT with the kids and good for a cuddle for me whenever I need one. She's such a good dog.
Last but not least Blessing Number Six: Me... Yep I'm my own blessing. I have decided that I am strong and I can handle all of this. God wouldn't give me all of this responsibility if I couldn't handle it (ok so he thinks I am a superhero and can handle anything apparently). It'll all be okay. If I keep my faith and keep trying to do the next right thing (Thanks Maw Maw).

Journalling prompt of the day: What do you know about your maternal grandparents? Tell about your relationship with them.

My grandmother Lelia Florence Head Longman is my hero. She's the kind of person I want to be. Outspoken, Funny, Loving, and so Creative! I spent a lot of time with her growing up because my Mom worked a whole lot. I remember playing while she taught Ceramics classes. She's give the the ceramics that didn't mold well and I'd paint them or scratch them up with the tools she used. And she LET me! She always encouraged me to try things my own way instead of telling me what to do. She let me create things. She taught me how to crochet, and cross stitch and I recently got her in to scrapbooking. She speaks her mind and gets a lot of crap from people because she does so. I admire her for it. Even when she's speaking her mind about me. I value her opinions so much. Good, bad, or in between. She's a mother of four who went back to school to become a nurse. She's an excellent nurse. She loves what she does.

My grandfather Barton Wesley Longman. I have always looked up to him and cared deeply about what he thought of me. I seek his approval a lot. He has been a constant source of strength in my life. One of the people I can turn to when everything is falling down around me and he will help me fix it or hold my hand while I let go and wait for something better to happen. A true Southern Gentleman that NEVER goes outside without his hair combed and sprayed into place. I remember teasing him as a child and messing with his hair to aggravate him. I remember him playing with me. Even though he is a very dignified and reserved man, I remember his snapping his dentures at me to make me laugh. Now he does the same thing to my kids! He's always ready with a hug and he has a dry sense of humor that sets me to giggling time after time.
Hugs! I feel so much better! (P.S. My grandparents are blessings too!)

Wednesday, July 25, 2007

Heather and the Horrible, No Good, Terrible, Bad Day!

Okay. My blog used to be funny. At least to me. A long time ago. Now it's filled with whining. And here I go again. Yesterday we had to go to the surgeon's office again. Brandon has to have a new bellybutton. They have to cut the center out of his bellybutton and re-stitch it closed. So that he will heal. The piece of tissue that's in the center of it now is glandular tissue according to the surgeon and isn't likely to heal ever. Lovely. While they are "in there" they are going to look and make sure that his bellybutton isn't linked some how to his bladder. They think that there is a small connection that may be causing urine to leak out of the hole where it hasn't healed. So I'm very worried about him. There's been no infection so far because I've been cleaning it like crazy. So please say prayers. The surgery is scheduled for August 10th.

A friend of mine commented that she hadn't seen an update on my blog in a while. That's part of the reason. Another part is that Alexis is having an incredibly rough time. This morning she was raging like mad. Furiously angry over the fact that the spoon she wanted wasn't clean. Furious over the fact that I expected her to eat Cheerios for breakfast (She likes Cheerios!). Nothing I did was quick enough, good enough or acceptable. She started throwing things and hitting herself and I had to restrain her from hurting herself or others which just breaks my heart. She sits in my lap and struggles like a little wild animal trying to break free. I was told to hold her until she calms down. Which could be 5 minutes or an hour depending on what type of day it is. The whole time she screamed bloody murder and spit all over me. Screaming how she hates me and she can't calm down. She finally stopped and calmed down a bit but has been defiant all day long. My heart just breaks for her. I try not to get angry with her and view it as an "emotional seizure". Something she has no control over. It's really hard to stay calm but I managed today. Tomorrow is a new (hopefully better) day. I just have to take it one day at a time. Or one hour or minute at a time. Whatever it takes.

The part that saddens me a whole lot is that to Jordan this is "normal" behavior in our house. She never knows if Alexis will be happy or angry or screaming and all of this is taken into stride. She thinks that's how sisters are supposed to act and just tunes her out. Brandon gets hysterical. First because I have to put him down to help Alexis, and then during her tantrum he gets scared from her screaming and he starts crying. He doesn't understand why I can't come to pick him up. He's becoming more jumpy when he's around her. When anyone talks loud he jumps. I feel like we live in a war zone. You never know what's going to hit next. We are walking on eggshells around her. Trying not to provoke her. We even have a code word for it. I tell Ronnie when he's saying something that will make her angry "Don't feed the bears." You know how in parks they tell you not to feed the bears because it could provoke them to attack. Same thing here. It's unbelievable.

Journalling prompt of the day:

What important lesson did you learn as a child? Did you carry any over into adulthood?

In the theme of today's blog already. I learned not to rock the boat. Be accepting and flexible and don't argue. Behave yourself and don't question authority. Do what you are told! Of course I learned these lessons because they were forced upon me. Day after day. I had no opinion before I turned 18. Once I got older I decided to rock the boat hard! And I have been pretty much going my own way since (Ask Ronnie, It can get rather dicey around here if I think I'm being bossed around). I think that's why this behavior with Alexis has me so out of sorts with myself. Because I feel like I'm walking on eggshells again. Trying not to rock the boat and keep the peace. I am taking it personally because I feel like I'm being pushed to do the things she wants me to do just so it'll be okay around here. And really even if I do what she wants it doesn't make her happy. Happiness is an inside job. And a job for her medicine which is so not where it needs to be right now. I don't think any of us are happy right now least of all her. I wish there was something I could do to make it better. All I can do at this point is pray. For all of us but especially for my baby girl.


Thursday, July 19, 2007

Tag questions! and Journalling prompt!

Pretty good day! Alexis had a psychiatrist's appointment and her med dose is increasing. Brandon is gaining weight so I still get to breastfeed. Jordan is asking to go to school. I hope she does well when it starts up again. Anyone else counting the days until school starts again!?

Tagged by Michelle!

My roommate and I once: Ate spaghetti made with spinach pasta and then drank these huge Screwdrivers out of plastic cups. Spinach pasta is not cute on the side of a building. (ask my roommate!) Ick!

Never in my life have I: Felt happier than the moment when my son was shown to me for the first time.

High school was : Not the absolutely greatest experience. It wasn't terrible though. I had some pretty great friends. (No I'm not talking about you Lisa! JK)

When I'm nervous : I bite my cuticles. I know gross!

My hair : Is awful! It looks like I stuck my finger in a light socket! All of the post baby hormones have it thinning and brittle. So not fun.

When I was 5 : My Mom married my step-dad and my little brother was born. Things have never been the same!

When I turn my head left : I see my bulletin board. Full of ideas for my next scrapbook page and a photo of my grandma who passed away before I got to know her well.
I should be : Scrapbooking. I have two pages due. One for my creative team and one for a circle journal.

By this time next year : Brandon will be walking! OMG

My favorite aunt is : So sweet! She bought me a Cricut cartridge just because.

I have a hard time understanding : Why my daughter's birth parents did the things that they did to them. =0(

You know I like you if : I let you play with my kids. I'm very protective of them.

My ideal breakfast is : Coffee and whatever is lying around. Cereal, Oatmeal, Blah blah.

If you visit my home town : You won't see much. It was devastated by Katrina. Port Sulphur, La.

If you spend the night at my house : My kids will wake you up at five in the morning! But you'll have fun! You may have to fend for yourself for food. I'm tired of cooking. I may even make you cook.

My favorite blonde is : Brandon! I can't believe he's blonde!

My favorite redhead is: Jordan

My favorite brunette is : Alexis and I guess Ronnie. LOL Does the dog count too?

The animal I would like to see flying besides birds : Elephants. That'd be kinda funny. Although the poop would be hell on a paint job!

I shouldn't have been : So quick to drop out of college.

Last night I: Threw up! Hey I didn't feel good. Then I put the baby to bed and read a book about bipolar disorder. I did laundry too. Fun times!

A better name for me would be : DH calls me Bubba. LOL I have no idea why.

I've been told I look like : My grandpa. (Yeah thanks!)

If I could have any car, it would be: I am actually driving the car I always wanted. A 2007 RED Dodge Grand Caravan. It's awesome! LOL I'm the ultimate minivan Mom!

I'm tagging.... Lisa, Adriann, and Martha (if she's reading this)

Journalling prompt of the day:

How did you show your independence when you were a teenager?

Oh Lord! I was the kind of teenager that parents have nightmares about (Lexie, Jordan and Brandon if you're reading this when you are older DON'T DO THE FOLLOWING!!!!!). During High School I was a really good kid. Not so much by choice but because my Step Dad was EXTREMELY strict. Evilly so. When I was 18 he ended up going to jail, and then the party started. Because I had been so cooped up I rebelled big time. I chopped my hair off. I dyed it black. I partied at all hours of the night. Coming home late. One time my Mom told me if I didn't come home for 12:00 curfew that the door would be locked. She locked it and I slept in my truck. I dated a not so great guy and ended up living with him for a year and a half. After we broke up I moved back in with my Mom to raise some more hell. I never slept at night. I would only sleep during the day. I was a baaaaaaaaaaaaaad girl. Oh and I dropped out of college after a month of going. Not so smart! And I got a tattoo! And my belly button pierced! All of these things are forgivable thank goodness. I am just glad I didn't do anything worse. Jeez. Like all of that isn't bad enough.

Recently I watched some old video tapes I had of me in Choir. I ended up crying. I was so innocent (to a degree), and I had so much promise. I feel like I've failed that girl. Not that being a Mom isn't awesome because it is. But I had such big dreams. I wish I could go back and tell that girl not to make the mistakes that I made. It's not possible so I have to forgive myself and move on, but it's really hard.


Tuesday, July 17, 2007

Isn't it ironic?

Last night Ronnie had a Dr's appointment. He's been trying to study for his CPA exam and says he's having a hard time. He can't focus and his mind is racing too much to study. Well you know what that sounds like? ADHD. I had him ask the Dr. about it and yep you guessed it. He has ADHD. He's going to be on Adderall. Just like Alexis. It's kind of ironic because he's fussing at Alexis all the time because she doesn't listen and can't pay attention. Well what now Bubba you have the same problem! I really hope the Adderall helps him. I have to go get it at the pharmacy in a little bit but Brandon is taking a nap and we are NOT waking him up. Jordan had a rough night last night and didn't sleep well at all.

Today has been kind of *GASP* calm! I know you don't believe it! LOL Alexis has been watching TV and kinda hanging out and Jordan has been her loud self but has been just kinda hanging out too. No fighting. It's a miracle! My new washing machine is coming tomorrow. Which is great b/c the banging on the washing machine isn't working anymore. Right now it's sitting there with a full load of clothes in a full load of water. Crud. Trying to figure out what I'm going to do with that. Ick!

Ronnie made the comment this morning that after the kids are all in school he thought it'd be a good idea if I go to college. WHAT! Ok I'm excited. I miss learning new things and one of my biggest regrets is not being able to finish college. My grandma went to college late (after her kids were grown). I'd love to go back. I really would like to be an occupational therapist specializing in pediatrics. Really I would. It would be 5 years from now before I could start but I'm excited! Really excited. LOL

Journalling prompt: Do you dream at night? What do you dream about?

Last night I was dreaming about the CT LO I had to finish this morning. LOL Yes I dream about scrapbooking usually. And every now and then I dream some really off the wall stuff. For example, One time (while pregnant) I dreamed that Ronnie and I took the kids to the Zoo and we were walking on a pier in the alligator exhibit (which in real life has very high sides) that didn't have any sides on it. Well there was a gator right next to the pier and Alexis reached down to "pet" it. As she did the alligator comes up to eat her. I grabbed her by her foot and yanked her upside down in the air. As I did Jordan started to go over the other side of the pier and I grabbed her up by her foot too! Then I started running down the pier (hugely pregnant in my dream too) with a kid in each hand upside down and alligators snapping at them the whole way through. And I was yelling at Ronnie. THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT. YOU WERE THE ONE THAT WANTED TO COME TO THE STUPID ZOO. LET'S SEE THE ALLIGATORS YOU SAID. YEAH HOW MUCH FUN IS THIS! Even in my dreams I'm mean. LOL

Monday, July 16, 2007

Washing Machine Wash Out

My poor washing machine. It's 7 years old and has been with us through thick and thin. Two moves, Three kids, A dog... and it's tired. Lately whenever I turn it on it gets halfway through the cycle and just quits. To get it to start again I have to go in there and SLAM the lid shut. (Yes I found that out by being ticked off when I figured out it wasn't working and I slammed the lid shut because I was mad. See temper tantrums have some benefits!) So it's been kinda working, but I remember before we had a washing machine when I had to drag my clothes to the laundromat before we had kids! I'd be there for hours. It was hot, sticky, and expensive! No thank you. I can just imagine trying to corral all three kids in a laundromat if the stupid thing breaks. (No Alexis, Don't turn the dryer on with Jordan in it!! THUMP, THUMP!!) Fun stuff right? So Saturday I broke down and got a new one. A Whirlpool Duet Sport. Which looks SUPER cool! I love those front loading washing machines where you can watch the clothes washing! I told Ronnie that I wanted it because it saved electricity and water but secretly I want to watch the clothes swish around and see them getting clean! I am so weird. Alexis must take after me. She likes to watch the coffee drip into the coffee pot. So hey maybe this watching clothes wash will keep her occupied too!

Speaking of Alexis... She's been doing a whole lot better. We've instituted a reward system with money and a piggy bank. When she behaves or I 'catch' her being good she gets to put a penny or whatever change I have in the piggy bank. When it fills up she can buy her own toy with her own money that she earned. So teaching monetary responsibility and good behavior. So far so good! I've been reading a book about parenting bipolar children and the parent is supposed to stay as low key as possible. Very hard for me as I am a very emotional person but I've been working on it and it seems to be helping. We are taking one day at a time.

Jordan is doing well. She's been going to tons of therapy and she's looking forward to school starting again. She wants to go play with her friends. Big difference from the first day when I dropped her off screaming!! Brandon's bellybutton is still yucky. I have to make another appointment for him today. As far as him eating. I think he's fine. He's wetting and pooping okay. Last night he was super cranky. I think he's teething! Lovely stuff! We brought the dog for her shots on Saturday too. It turns out she has hot spots that are infected. I swear she's always got something going on with her but she wouldn't be a part of this family if she didn't! LOL

Ok enough blabbing... Journalling prompt of the day: What in your life didn't turn out the way you expected? Are you ok with it or do you wish things would've been different?

Wow where to start on this one. So many things haven't turned out how I expected. There's a saying that says if you want to hear God laugh tell him your plans. It's so true. He has his own plan for you and that's what's going to happen. Sometimes I may not understand WHY he's not doing things my way but he's always got a reason.

I remember being so upset when we were having problems getting pregnant. I expected to try for a month or so and get pregnant pretty quickly. It didn't happen. Over the years the infertility treatments had me so depressed. Every month another negative pregnancy test after prayer after prayer. My thoughts ran to... Well maybe I wouldn't be a good Mom and that's why God doesn't want me to get pregnant? Maybe I'm just not good enough? Maybe I don't deserve to be a Mom? Maybe I did something wrong? All of these were not true! I truly believe that we experienced infertility so that we would adopt our two beautiful daughters and then after we adopted them God blessed us with a son. See God had a plan I didn't know about. He knew those two little girls would need us. THAT'S why we couldn't get pregnant. Do I wish things were different? Absolutely not! I am so thankful that he has a plan for us even when it doesn't feel like he's doing things the way I want, his way is much more amazing than my ideas and expectations could ever dream of.


Friday, July 13, 2007

This CT thing is keeping me busy!

The new creative team has me hopping busy! And all of the kids appointments too. I am so excited for school to start just so I can get a break every now and then. I was so stressed out last night after bringing Brandon for his shots. They want him to go back to the surgeon. When we got to the Dr. it was STORMING raining. I mean coming in sideways. I had three kids, one me, and one, umbrella. Ummmmm... Ok. I threw my backpack over my back and grabbed the baby! So far so good. Then I told Alexis to unbuckle and wait by the door. I had to wake Jordan up. She had just fallen asleep! You can imagine how happy she was. She told me to "leave her alone". So I grabbed her in the other arm, and told Alexis to shut the door. I staggered to the overhang trying to hold an umbrella and two kids and Alexis' hand somehow. We finally made it. I set Jordan down to close the umbrella and she promply threw a fit and SAT in a puddle of water. Right in front of the window where everyone could see her. (I found out later that everyone was talking about the little girl who FELL in the water. No people she was having a tantrum!) Anyway we got in and waited in the waiting room for an hour. My kids are not good waiters.

Jordan was running in circles, playing with the trash can, and hollering HUP TWO, THREE, FOUR at the very top of her lungs. Like she's in the army. (One can only wish she had that much discipline) And she keeps opening the door. She very lovingly patted someone elses baby and made him cry. (he wasn't hurt but he was startled because he was trying to sleep) I just couldn't get there fast enough to keep her from "petting" him. Alexis was her usual Chatty Cathy self telling everyone in the waiting room what kind of underwear she was wearing and how Brandon is stinky when he poops (REALLY stinky).

When we got back to the room we had another 20 minutes of waiting so I decided to take them all to the bathroom. On the way to the bathroom one of the nurses (I'm sure she thought she was helping) gave them all pinwheels. Well my children are not content to blow on them and watch them spin. Alexis was spinning in 40 mph circles and Jordan used hers as a crude sword and began stabbing Alexis in the back with it while she was spinning. Brandon at this point is hungry and making his MMMMMMMMMMMM noise. (That means if you don't feed me in the next 10 minutes WATCH OUT) We get to the bathroom. Alexis is tired of being stabbed with the pinwheel so she's yelling at Jordan. Jordan's back to yelling HUP TWO, THREE, FOUR and now she's saluting us with her sword/pinwheel by bopping herself in the head. All of the sudden Alexis decides to get her Jordan back for hitting her and they start smacking each other with the pinwheels. I ignored them for as long as I could but it started looking like a fight scene from Pirates of the Carribean. So I figured I'd intervene before someone lost an eye. (Argh matey an eyepatch for us all!)

I carry/push/drag them all back into the exam room and a while later the Dr. comes in. I'm standing there at the table with the Dr. and I hear Alexis say... (Yeah Cookie turn it off!) and as I turn to say NO!! It goes dark. She turned off the lights. Alexis pipes up... I onliest told her to do it Mom I didn't do it!!! I find the switch, get it back on and order them to sit on the bench and DON'T MOVE! Brandon gets his shots and we leave. But not before the Dr. informs me that B is losing weight. I have to go back in a week to make sure he is gaining weight or I won't be able to continue breastfeeding him. The Dr. has the nerve to inform me that stress can decrease milk supply and ask me if I'm stressed. Lady you have NO IDEA! LOL

Alexis is doing better today. Adding the Adderall in seems to have made a HUGE difference. I'm so very thankful. It's been a quiet decent day!

Journalling prompt of the day: Are you crafty? What crafts do you enjoy doing?

Ya'll already know I'm a scrapbooker. Paper and digi! I love, love, LOVE it. I also do cross stitch and I like to pretend I can sew on my sewing machine (but it's just pretending. I kinda suck at it!) I also like making little arts and crafts with the kids.

P.S. Comments make me happy! Tell me what to write about tomorrow. Talk to me people!!!! LOL