Wednesday, November 19, 2008

I am not a good backer upper...

As I peeked through the prompts for the Jessica Sprague "Stories in Hand" class I'm taking, I came across one about automobiles. I wanted to tell the story about why I do not like to drive in reverse. I am NOT a good backer upper!

I learned how to drive like pretty much everyone else. You get in the car with your parents, and they are hoping you do not wreck and kill them, and you hope they will not yell at you and cause you to freak out, wreck, and kill them. Ah memories! I had such a hard time learning how to drive a stick shift that my Step Dad had his hands full even teaching me to go forward.

Vroom! "Ok now let off the clutch, and ease on the gas." Vroom! Clank! Erk. Silence...

I never did get the hang of that stupid stick shift! I did not get my drivers license until I was 18 years old. This did not stop me from getting into a wreck before then. (I am outing myself to my Grandma as I write this because she reads this blog and she does NOT know this.) One day my Step Dad let me practice driving in his Parish (County) vehicle. He was the coroner's assistant, (That will be a whole other story in the future probably.) and he had a Chevy Caprice that he was able to drive as a benefit for his job. One day he was teaching me to drive and insisted I pull out in a busy intersection near the Post Office in Belle Chasse, La. even though I was scared. I said, "No!" repeatedly, but he insisted. Finally he got impatient and yelled at me to pull out so I did, but I did not accelerate fast enough, and I got hit in the back of the car! He yelled at me, and made me switch seats with him so it would look like he was driving. No one was the wiser, but this terrified me from driving. I seriously waited 2 more years to drive on a public road again.

Getting my license at 18 consisted of driving around one rural town block in Port Sulphur, Louisiana. The driving inspector knew my grandparents, and passed me with flying colors. Yay! She did not even make me parallel park, or back up (Thank God!) After a few years of driving, I got the forward stuff down pat. It was the backing up part that got me. I just could not do it. Over the years I've backed into a tree, a fence at a doctor's office, a shopping basket, and yes, I'm ashamed to admit... my own fence. Once I even backed into a ditch. It was late at night, and I had to call a tow truck to pull my Chevy Blazer (Pimp Mobile) out. It was so far in the ditch that the headlights pointed UP! It took the tow truck driver a good five minutes to stop laughing long enough to pull the stupid thing out unharmed. Even though I'm a bad backer upper, I've had the good luck not to ever seriously damage anything or anyone.

I am pretty proud to announce that over the years I have finally gotten better. It only took 10 years for me to figure out how to drive in reverse. Now I can back up whole streets, and I do it just because I can. I am sure people think I'm crazy, but I have to practice! I wouldn't want my backer upper skills to get rusty!

Hugs,
Heather

5 comments:

Leah. said...

ROFL!!!!!! Remind me not be behind you.

Lisa said...

OH MY GOSH!!! I remember that night you went in the ditch. I was laughing so hard i thought i would peepee on myself! lol!

Jessica's mom said...

Oh My, Oh My, Oh My... A HS friend of mine had to drive down his street backwards before his parent's would let him take the test, but I tell you what, he could drive backwards!

Me? Oh I just had to move out of the house.

Cheryl Wray said...

Oh no!!! :-) Great stories!!!

TheresaK said...

haha! great story!!I always had a hard time backing up too!